*The one I let fall…*

By Freek at 9:11 pm on Saturday, November 8, 2008

Today, I wished I could have practised my shuttle run hard enough during my P.E years in Pri/Sec/JC.

I really wish I was faster.

Cos’, my Aaliya had her first fall today.

And it broke my heart a million pieces when I was just 1second away from grabbing her from falling. Really, till now, I’ve had replays of how she fell, how she screamed in pain afterwards and how hysterical I was. It was traumatic for me.

Usually, I needn’t have to buckle her up when I put her in the stroller. Since she mostly just lays down, I figured, leaving her for that 1 minute would be fine. That was my very HUGE mistake. The dummy that I was, I forgot that she has already started rolling and shifting herself from one place to another. She likes to wriggle and wriggles more now. And so, she squirmed and squirmed on the pram and started sliding down the pram. I ran as fast as I could but just when I was about to reached her, she fell. Her feet touched the ground first, then her knees and then her stomach and finally, hit her head on the cold tiled floor of my staff room.

Although there was no thud, I was already panicking like a bloody fuck idiot. I was afraid she broke her nose or hit her head too hard. I guess my heart raced faster than I ran. She was already screaming and wailing at this point. I carried her and held her so?tightly in my arms. Gosh, can’t believe I’m crying again right now. Couldn’t bear to see her sobbing, tears flowing endlessly and her eyes clenched shut and face all red. But when I saw a faint bruise on the right side of her forehead, that was it. I broke down instantaneously. My sis who was with me, tried consoling me, but I was just to full of guilt, regret?and sadness. It may sound crazy how distraught I was, but any mum would feel the same, what more a first-time mum like me.

Slowly, her crying subsided. She opened her eyes and?I think she noticed?her mum who was already sobbing?and wet in the face from all that tearing. The little angel looked at her Iboo, and..


I was ecstatic. In between the tears, I laughed with my sis. I was relieved though it didn’t take away the regret.

I’m glad Aaliya wasn’t affected much. She still has that bruise now as I type this, but I hope it goes away soon.

And if you see me very ngiao or fussy with my kid, you know jolly well, that I have fucking learnt my lesson. As freaking cliche as it may sound, It’s better to be safe than sorry.

Aaliya, Iboo so, so, sorry, darling.

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*Ultra long…*

By Freek at 12:57 am on Saturday, November 1, 2008

This will be a super-long entry since I haven’t updated for quite a while. Mostly pictures though.

The Lil’ One has finally slumbered. It’s easier to make her sleep these days. I just roll her to one side, let her hug her bolster and within minutes, she’ll doze off. Her daddy’s sleeping beside her. Poor man, having diarrhoea.

Anyhows, it has been hectic these past 2 weeks. Exams, marking exams, keying in of marks. Thank God all’s done. Now I’m left to think about the year-end concert. Somehow I’ve been put to handle the stage decor. Which is a huuUUuuge thing for me. And I’ve been super-kanchiong about it since it’s a scary responsibility to hold eventhough I’m quite alright with it. So, I’m actually shagged to the max and even now, my (eye)pupils keep moving to the middle and almost meeting one another. Damn tired. Won’t be surprised if I find myself on my keyboard in the morn. *yawnz*

As for Aaliya, I’m actually quite disturbed by some comments from?ignorant individuals. One thing I’ve never liked is when people start comparing kids. Comparing your own kids is a bad idea. Comparing yours and others, is just horrible. Ok, sure, so at 5 months, Aaliya doesn’t roll over that much. When she does roll over, sometimes she doesn’t really succeed since she still hasn’t figured out how to move her hand so she doesn’t get stuck halfway. Sure, Aaliya doesn’t crawl as yet too. But I’m grateful to God that my baby is healthy and she’s active in her own way. She can hold her head up, she reaches for things and grabs them. As long as she’s feeding well, not down with anything, I’m contented. Besides, I was slow too when I was a baby but alhamdullilah I’m alright now, aren’t I? So, sheesh, shut the trap will, ya? Geez.

So, on to happier thoughts, some updates.

I’ve started Aaliya on Nestum. A lil’ diluted just to get her started. Will start her proper when she hits 6 months. Till then, whenever she gets the bottle, she guards it like you cannot imagine. (this’ her plain water bottle. Obviously, her milk bottle cannot be soOOooo tiny, aye?) Hair looks like those toy trolls a long time back?which had hair that stood up in bright, bright colours. Heh.

Last weekend, Dy & I attended 2 weddings. First was my cousin’s. Managed to see Aaliya’s cousin who was born?about 1 month after Aaliya – Mohamad Amshar.

And then to Dy’s buddy’s wedding where I attempted to help make the bunga for the guy’s samping. *shakes head* I shall not elaborate.

On Deepavali, Dy turned 28. A few days prior to it, I had to wake up in the middle of the night to make those jerseys-on-toothpicks thingy. It’s hard to make surprises when we barely leave each other. Heh. And since I can’t bake for nuts, I got Tween to make the cupcakes while I.. erm.. supervised the colours and design.

I can’t say how much I love the man. I’m blessed.


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